Our Beloved Ones: Children

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Children are a blessing from Allah (swt). As they are innocent and sinless, they can be directed into righteous people with a positive approach. We should always try to treat our children in a fair way. We should treat neither the boy nor the girl in an unjust way. As known, even in Muslim countries, families might be treating the boy or the girl unjustly. This is not the way in Islam. We should treat and embrace all of our children in the same way. Also we should not abandon them if they have disability and mental illness etc. We should always remember the children are a great gift but also we should realize that they are given as amanah (trust) from Allah (swt).

When we become families, we do start to realize the importance of bringing up a child. Some families do not consider taking any assistance and do not want to see these problems that they are facing with their beloved ones. Some families seek help from pedagogues.

What is more important is not to be ignorant, irresponsible but always being approachable. The key factor is the “love.” Children can easily realize if they are loved or not. This love will indeed reflect to their life all the way through, i.e childhood, education, social and professional life. Unfortunately, we see some people’s attitude towards children is unpleasant. We can also see others who do not treat the others’ children the way that they treat their own ones.

We even see some families who claim that they are acting on the Quran and Sunnah way but when it comes to spare the time for their beloved ones, they are either busy with their work or they are tired and need time for resting. Conversely, spending some quality time with our children plays a great role and the benefits are imponderable. We should understand that it is important to spend this time when our children really needs us to play not only when we feel like to play with them and convince ourselves that we fulfilled our duties.

What about our Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him)? Do not you think he is the model for the whole of humankind? He showed great interest in playing with them. He embraced them and showed great kindness to all of them. His behaviour towards children was always compassionate and merciful. He treated them all similarly. We can read and see from his life that he would love them and have fun with them.

In one hadith Abu Hurairah (may Allah (swt) be pleased with him) narrated:

I went along with Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) at a time during the day but he did not talk to me and I did not talk to him until he reached the market of Banu Qainuqa`. He came back to the tent of Fatimah and said, “Is the little chap (meaning Al-Hasan) there?” We were under the impression that his mother had detained him in order to bathe him and dress him and garland him with sweet garland. Not much time had passed that he (Al-Hasan)  came running until both of them embraced each other, thereupon Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “O Allah, I love him; love him and love one who loves him.” (Muslim)

Anas ibn Malik (may Allah (swt) be pleased with him), the servant of the Prophet, had another recollection: I never saw anyone who was more compassionate towards children than Allah (swt)’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him). His son Ibrahim was in the care of a wet nurse in the hills around Madinah. He would go there, and we would go with him, and he would enter the house, pick up his son and kiss him, then come back. (Muslim)

We mentioned the importance of love towards our children and the influences. Loving and embracing our little ones touches to their hearts and therefore their actions in this life will be designed according to our behaviour towards them. So once again, showing our love (practically) is one of the key factors.

Narrated Abu Hurairah (may Allah (swt) be pleased with him): Allah’s Messenger kissed Al-Hasan ibn `Ali while Al-Aqra` ibn Habis At-Tamim was sitting with him. Al-Aqra` said, “I have ten children and have never kissed one of them.” The Prophet cast a look at him and said, “Whoever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.” (Al-Bukhari)

We are all busy with various issues throughout the day. Father, works all day a long, comes to home very tired. Mother is busy with the home work and looks after the children and finally at the end of the day both parents are exhausted and all they want is to sit and rest. They do not have further patient for their children because they used it for some other purposes. Well what about our Prophet? He was always patient and considerate with children. He showed great attention for not to hurt their pure feelings.

Narrated Abu Qatadah: “The Messenger of Allah came towards us while carrying Umamah the daughter of Abi Al-`As (Prophet’s granddaughter) over his shoulder. He prayed, and when he wanted to bow, he put her down, and when he stood up he lifted her up.” (Al-Bukhari)

In another hadith, narrated Umm Khalid: I (the daughter of Khalid ibn Said) went to Allah’s Messenger with my father and I was wearing a yellow shirt. Allah’s Messenger said, “Sanah, Sanah!” (`Abdullah, the narrator, said that sanah meant “good” in the Ethiopian language). I then started playing with the seal of prophethood (between the Prophet’s shoulders) and my father rebuked me harshly for that. Allah’s Messenger said, “Leave her.” The Prophet, then, invoked Allah to grant her a long life thrice. (Al-Bukhari)

In another narration we see the Prophet’s tolerance towards children. Narrated `A’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her): The Prophet took a child in his lap … and then the child urinated on him, so he asked for water and poured it over the place of the urine. (Al-Bukhari)

We as Muslims should be conscious and wise to treat our children justly: “Fear Allah and treat your children [small or grown] fairly (with equal justice).” (Al-Bukhari)

We should take a great lesson from our Prophet Muhammad’s (pbuh) attitude toward children. His actions must be a model for all of us and at all times.

O Allah! Make us and our children of those who maintain salaah and accept my duaa (supplication). O Allah! Forgive us, our parents and all the believers on the Day of Reckoning. O Allah! Keep us alive as a Muslim and let us die as a Muslim. We seek from You health and piety, security, good morals and willingness on fate. O Allah! Make us most grateful to You and to remember You in abundance and act upon Your advice and to remember Your will. O Allah! We beg You for that which incites Your Mercy and the means of Your forgiveness, safety from every sin, the benefit from every good deed, success in attaining Jannah and deliverance from Fire. Amin!